Dave Parmeter's Story

DAVID W. PARMETER went to be with his Lord and Savior Jesus Christ on Monday, November 30, 2009. He was 55 years old having been born on January 19, 1954 to Norman and Marjorie Parmeter in Soap Lake, WA. He was a 1972 graduate of Eisenhower High School, Yakima, WA. He is survived by his beloved wife, Deborah; son, Brian Parmeter of Kennewick; daughter, Stephanie Parmeter of Buckley, WA; and his two sisters, Debra Still of Kennewick and Lorilee Anderson (Frank) of Seattle. He will also be missed by his three grandchildren as well as other members of the extended Parmeter, Rambo and Lumsden families.

Dave bought Autobahn Auto Care Center in 2000, the only employee-owned express lube and car wash in the Tri-Cities. Previously Dave worked as employee and part owner the Elephant Car Washes in the greater Seattle area, managing the facility in Tacoma. A man of many talents, he especially enjoyed restoring old cars which he loved to do with his son, Brian.

From his first day in the Tri-Cities, he felt his destiny was here and the legacy he leaves with us has been the lives he touched in so many different ways. Dave gave of his time, experience and generosity to numerous charities, fundraisers and foundations. He was a strong supporter of Citizens for Medical Isotopes and was delighted to see local growth in innovation and use of medical isotopes. He served as Board Treasurer of Grace Clinic; Vice President, Board of Trustees of Benton-Franklin Humane Society; and Past President of the Pasco-Kennewick Rotary. For several years, the Autobahn was a major sponsor of the Rotary Duck Race.

Dave’s unique gift was friendship, unequivocally given and nurtured by his ability to find the best in everyone he met and to enjoy a laugh at each turn. David was never reluctant to share his reliance on and belief in Jesus Christ with all who came to know him. While not always in a pew, he walked his faith. With a huge heart, David was larger than life and his friendships legendary. The tremendous outpouring of love given back to Dave and his family during his illness is a testament to his presence in the community and to his quiet deep faith.

A memorial service will be held Saturday, December 12, 2009 at 2:00 p.m. at Cathedral of Joy, 1153 Gage Blvd., Richland, WA. Those who wish to honor Dave’s memory are encouraged to make donations to Grace Clinic, 3180 W Clearwater Avenue, #A, Kennewick, WA 99336-2765 or to Benton-Franklin Humane Society, 8620 W Gage Blvd. Kennewick, WA 99336. Please view Dave’s story at www.davestory.org

Saturday, November 28th

I understand how hard it is with a “need to know” followed by a respect for privacy and I appreciate that. The process of passing at home with the help of Hospice is not new to me, but each circumstance is different. Our nurses have been wonderful in giving us signs to watch for and a general timeline. But then you know Dave, and he can be the exception to the rule, especially in this case as he is fairly young and has a big, strong heart.

He is resting comfortably, sipping water, and sleeping for the most part. It is quite touching when he is able to meet his wife half way for a kiss. We caregivers have gotten into a routine of sorts and it is a privilege to be there for Dave. From my experience I know that it can be emotionally draining and the best thing we can do for ourselves is to eat something and take a nap when we need to.

For those of you who have come to visit, we thank you. You have been a comfort to Deb, breaking the routine and I thank you for your respect of the situation. By the way, Bob Johnson, I rather like your take of the name situation by addressing us as Pete and Repeat, although I’m not sure which Deb is which–doesn’t matter.

I guess what I’d like to leave you with is Dave is still with us and until you hear otherwise, no news is good news.

God bless you all,
Sister Deb

–>Dave’s Elves and Friends:

Kadlec Staff did their wonders stabilizing Dave from Monday until Wednesday afternoon allowing Dave to head home last night. Debbie also got some much needed rest as well.

Dave was checked out of Kadlec Wednesday afternoon and was able to get a good nights rest at home. During this Thanksgiving Day, family members have been with Dave and Debbie as they share precious moments and reflections.

From a brief telephone conversation with Dave today, he expressed deep appreciation for all that everyone has done for him and his family in his time of need this past month. Dave wanted me to share with you this thought from him and Debbie, “Thank you; for every day has a reason to be celebrated in the spirit of Thanks Giving to God.”

Dave and his family remain in our thoughts and prayers. Tomorrow is another day for which we can all give thanks to God.

Amen Dave.

Claude

–>Dave’s Elves:

Dave really had a rough Monday after yesterday’s “Duck Roast” party at Country Gentleman. 

Debbie has just admitted Dave to Kadlec Hospital as Dave’s systems need stabilizing. Working with a tremendous Kadlec Staff, everyone is focused on Dave’s return home in a couple of days.

I saw Dave briefly this evening around 7:00 PM as Kadlec staff moved him through emergency admittance and on to Room 307. Dave is bright, bushy and straight thinking – so what’s new.

Dave and Debbie express their heartfelt gratitude for all of Dave’s Duck Roast friends and participants. We just got an e-mail from one of Dave’s boy hood friends now living in New Jersey.

Dave expressed appreciation for all the thoughts and prayers for Dave, Debbie and family. Our take – Dave was there and we enjoyed him and his party; Dave did not want it any other way. What a blast – Dave and Debbie truly enjoyed the festivities – Dave only wished he could have stayed longer.

To help Dave regain strength, Dave and Debbie ask that visitation be held to immediate family. Keep those thoughts, well wishes and prayers coming. Dave is consuming them all.

Claude

In the early 70’s, Dave worked at Summit View Shell Gas Station. As a young teenager interested in cars, I would hang out there quite a bit and this is where I got to know Dave.

A few years later, Dave got a job at Olympic Cascade Forest Products. I got a phone call from Dave. He asked me if I would like to come work with him. I said “sure”.

A few years later, Dave opened up Cascade Pre-Staining and he again called me up and offered me a job… “Sure”, I said.

In the 80’s Dave packed up and moved to Buckley WA. and started working at Rainier Shake Mill…Guess what…Yep!!!  I got the phone call and off I went. A few years went by and the cedar industry started to “Tank”.

So off Dave went to work at the Elephant Car Wash in Tacoma. I finally said to myself “enough”. I have got to let this guy go. I can’t keep this guy protected under my wing for ever. So I said to Dave, “Dude it’s a car wash, I think you can handle it. All you have to do is push a button and the Fricken machine washes the car”.  Well, that worked out well for a while and Dave said to himself “Hey, I’m getting pretty good at this button pushing thing” so off he went to the Tri-City’s, where he started his own business, the Autobahn Car Wash and Lube. I felt like a proud Mama duck. To see her little Duckie go off on his own and make it. Well done Dave…It’s about Fricken Time !!!

Part 2 – The Real Story

Remember that gas station I was talking about earlier, well it was right behind our house when I was growing up. My mom got her gas there and had her car serviced there for years. My mom knew Dave well before I did. As a single parent, she would ask Dave for advice from time to time about me, a teenage boy. Well, one day, my mom and I where having a difference of opinion. She left the house to go get gas at the station. I walked out back and climbed the fence, sat there and just glared at her. My mom kindly asked Dave to tell me to get down and go inside. Well, Dave walked over to the fence, looked up at me and said “Get your ass off that fence and get inside”…I don’t think that I ever moved that fast until that day but the whole time that I was running back inside, I was thinking to myself, “Man this guy is an ASSHOLE !!!”  Well, the next day, mom baked a big old plate of cookies and she asked me to bring them over to the guys at the station. So I swallowed my pride and sheepishly took the cookies to the station and that’s where my bond with Dave started and grew.

Over the years if I had any problem, big or small, if my mom needed help or advice, Dave was there for us. From repairing a hole in the wall (which I kicked one day), rebuilding the motor in mom’s Toyota and me buying my first car, Dave was there. Never willing to accept any money but always willing to accept cookies…I can’t begin to think, how many cookies this guy ate.

As I grew older, Dave was a phone call away. If I had a question about parenting one of my boys or family problems, he was there. When I met the Love of my life Kim, he was first person that I called.

In August of 2008, my mom had a massive brain bleed and was in a coma in the hospital in Yakima. I called Dave and he was there that day. I lost my mom the next day but I knew that she knew that Dave was there for me as he always has been.

You see, Dave is like the Big Brother that I never had…Dave might think of me as the Little Pesky Brother that he never had…But that’s OK with me.

I Love You Big Brother,
Kevin

ps – Dave, Kim and I want to thank you for Sunday night. We both felt honored when we were asked to join you and your family at your table for dinner.

Love,
Kevin and Kim

Here we go.

Saturday’s Christmas at Dave and Debs was quite the splash. I heard estimates of up to 200 people at any one time.  I know for a fact Deb and I ran out of tears of gratitude several times. We both know for a fact we will never be able to thank you or repay all of you at a level you poured your hearts out to us.  Once again, Jesus’ loving and comforting arms wound around us and his love was shared by all.

Monday Deb and I were at TCCC bright and early getting blood draws for current levels and expecting  reports sometime this wee and as of yet to get anything. Again we are in the hurry up and wait mode. I find myself there much more often than I would like. After a quiet day of rest Monday, we headed off to Dr. Bowers office for a final exam of the med-port to make sure there were no signs of infection or any other reasons for concern. Once again we had a delightful and awaking experience with Dr. Bowers as he is always willing to take a minute and answer our questions in a  manner we can both understand. What a great guy. At the conclusion, he turned to me and said “Are you ready for a challenge?” I responded “Sure I’m ready for anything.” After looking me squarely in the eye he said, “I have a marathon race in four months and I want you to be my partner.” While walking out his door I heard someone say “Dr. you gotta a deal.”  I think it was my voice. I have never said those words before in my life. Deb said it was my voice  after her jaw hit the floor. Guess I’m just gonna have to uphold my end of the bargain.

Yesterday was quiet as my son and granddaughter visited of a while. No doctor results. Today’s plans are even going to include a visit to the shop. I’ll keep you posted.

What have I learned today? How about an old lesson revisited? Everything is done in God’s time. Not your time. He has heard your prayers. Now let him have your problems and answer them in his time.

In Christ’s Love.

Dave

Hopefully most of you had the opportunity to meet Murphy and Tucker over the weekend. What you might not know is Murphy has been in my lap helping compose and doing spell-check. This morning I needed more lap room than usual and banned him to Deb’s chair. He is not a happy camper. I’ll make it up to him.

I had a great weekend and I pray you did too. I feel much better, stronger, lucid, and energetic, than all of last week. Deb and I concentrated on diet, fluids, and exercise, every chance I had to go just a little farther and longer. What a great gathering of LOVE as well. There is no way we can ever repay your generosities. I could ramble on for hours how wonderful my friends are, but there is no need. God has blessed me beyond boundaries. There are no more tears to cry, only laughter, no more old stories to tell, only new ones to begin, no more hand shakes just hugs, gratitude, payment, repayment, new life, examples to follow, leadership to maintain, growth, and at least 55 more I haven’t thought of.

Friday evening the chemo was removed. As I lied there on my chemo bed I prayed long and hard that the Lord made that moment in time my new beginning. I willed my body to start rebuilding and repairing. I just needed to turn the numbers around and that would be just as good of a time as any. At that point in time my body fluids changed to a more positive color, my ability to remove toxins, made their explosive début. People came from miles wide to share, rejoice, love, laugh, and give. This morning, “as early as possible” I am to go to TCCC and get new blood counts. The way I understand it is if they show an upward tendency then we will have to look for a new beginning. If they show any tendency of going down then it will be wait for two weeks and start chemo again and keep hitting it until we can get the numbers down to a safe level to hit the cancer with a level more likely to attack the cancer in a way the Dr.s are more comfortable with.

This place looks breathtakingly beautiful. I Thank You again. Most importantly, was the look on my wife’s face when she saw it all being put together. Now, that was priceless. A memory she will never forget, nor me as well. For her to come home and hear stories about my friends and then being able to put a face with a name, was priceless.

What have I learned today? Computers have a limited ability to express gratitude. The writer needs that ability and I am not quite there yet. I do, however, have the deepest gratitude for each and every one of you. Thank you so much.

In Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior’s name I thank and love each and every one of you.

Dave